[ Underneath Bakugou, Midoriya's body shakes with mirth at the dumb comment but he tries not to move too much so he doesn't upset the hammock. Bakugou's response is probably going to be the same as his, anyway, but this seems...awfully heavy for a talk about heroism and what kind of goals they have, right?
It's the silence that worries him. Bakugou looks like he's fighting with himself and Midoriya sits up just a little bit, core tensing as he holds himself up and debates if he ought to prod at him or ask him if he's okay. Maybe he's going to say he really wants to get rid of One for All. Maybe he's upset about that? It'd make sense, wouldn't it? Midoriya hadn't really given him a choice and -
And.
And.
Midoriya hears what he says but it's like his brain genuinely can't wrap around the concept of it. This isn't about heroism or being a pro or goals or anything else that he'd considered. This is - was this a proposal? A somewhat impromptu but well-meaning proposal, or was this a hypothetical? Bakugou wouldn't just set all of this up and then bring this up without thinking it over at least a little bit. There might not have been months of planning and forethought but his impulsiveness is usually battle-focused not life-changing declarations of marriage focused. Or maybe it was an impulse. Maybe he'd meant to say something else but didn't or maybe -
He has to say something doesn't he. He's supposed to, even if he doesn't have any idea of what to say but he can't just lay there like an idiot, silent. ]
Oh. You do.
[ Has Bakugou considered this? Midoriya's happy together with him, he loves Bakugou but the Number One hero married to the Number Two? That hasn't ever been done before. Even dating is a little bit of a nightmare in the top ranks because of the competition and everything else, which is why agencies vet people and handle press releases and -
How does it even work? Marriage with being heroes? He's considered it, sure, but it's always been kind of an abstract fantasy. He'd have a ring on Bakugou's finger he could kiss at any point, he and his mom would probably cry a lot and he'd get to say My husband, Katsuki, sure, but the how wasn't ever a point of consideration. It's putting a massive target onto Bakugou's back, too, worse than One for All does because this is public. This is a consistent danger he'd be volunteering himself for. ]
[Honestly, he gets scared the instant he says it. Katsuki Bakugou is supposed to be strong, courageous, and talented at whatever he pursues. But in the face of Midoriya's surprise, he takes it as uncertainty and begins to feel inadequate. That he's being judged and rejected already.
And he thinks weird, they're practically dating for the most part. And he wonders if maybe he was wrong. There's someone else. Todoroki, maybe. Midoriya is playing the field, maybe. Seeing all of the prospects before making a choice.
Ugh. His eyes squeeze shut a second or two, open, seem guarded when they peer at Midoriya this time. He can't think so coldly. He's better than that.] A while, I fuckin' guess... [He didn't exactly propose (or he wasn't trying to, at least), but Midoriya's answer is the typical over-analysis that's expected. He feels like an insect pinned down beneath a microscope. Midoriya is thinking about it in detail, lining everything up, ruining his spontaneity with questions.] Forget it... I didn't fuckin' mean, like... right now or shit.
[His head rolls back over in the opposite direction. He's quick on his feet in battle, but he's not entirely a strategist. He doesn't plan before he goes in. He goes in, hard, relentless, and then he figures out the best moves as he meets challenges. This is... different.
He went in, hard, relentless, with all the passion of his soul, and now he's left floundering, considering all of the pitfalls of it. Secrecy, publicity, infamy, idolatry. He'd have a target on his back, but like hell he wouldn't stomp down the street, wearing it proudly. Daring anyone to mess with him. Daring anyone to mess with Midoriya.]
[ He's just repeating what Bakugou's saying which isn't helping anything but his mind can't stop working over all of the options and possibilities and the shock that this is what Bakugou would want. Midoriya had kind of assumed it was a given on his own part; he wanted to spend as much time with Bakugou as humanly possible because he loved him. A life with him however he could have it was what Midoriya wanted but he'd...just sort of assumed Bakugou might not want the same.
In retrospect it feels stupid. He needs to say something sooner rather than later, though, or Bakugou's going to get the wrong idea and that's the last thing he wants. Bakugou's brave and Midoriya has always admired it but this is a different kind of bravery he can't minimize.
Slowly, the hand in his hair curls, urges him to tip his head back. It feels weird to have this conversation like this, but it's also...good. Right, in a way, that it's private and a little unexpectedly romantic. ]
I want... [ He stops, tongue running over his teeth as he pauses again, trying to work his train of thought into something useful. ] I want you. I keep thinking about how to say it, but that's really...what it boils down to, I guess. You've always been here with me in one way or another and I want that as long as I can have it, in whatever way I can have it. It was just - just surprising, I think.
[ His laugh doesn't have any humor to it, just a little shakiness. ]
You're amazing. I know I say that but sometimes I don't think even you believe just how much- how I- you're amazing, Kacchan. I want everything. It feels selfish, but that's what I want. Everything you wanna give me.
[Thankfully, Bakugou isn't resistant to having his head turned around. He peers at Midoriya, scrutinizing, though maybe just in regards to being called amazing. He knows he's amazing.
Well, he thinks as hard as he can he's amazing. What he really thinks is he's still the cause for a lot of misfortune to one of the greatest heroes to ever live.
Reaching up, he brushes his fingers over Midoriya's freckled face, up into Midoriya's hair where he curls his fingers and tugs. Firmly, but not painfully. His hand drops away, and he grunts in the back of his throat.] Quit lookin' at me with that stupid fucking face, nerd. [His eyes lower. He wants to turn away again, but knows Midoriya will just turn him back.]
I'm not gonna fucking be some two-digit hero married to the Number One. And you're not gonna fucking be some damn two-digit hero married to Number One either, not with your quirk. I'm fucking first, and you're second. Got it, dumbass?
If it comes down to it, you're first, and I'm second. So if you think I'm not going to claim you because of it, you're fucking stupid. I don't care who I have to kill. The only way you're standing at the fucking top is if you manage to get me out of the way. And the only damn one worthy of marrying you is whoever is second.
[ He gets it, he does, but he's also not going to bring that up. Better to keep it to heartfelt praise and a squawk as his hair is tugged. ]
S'just my face, jerk.
[ Midoriya tugs at Bakugou's hair in turn though the motion turns from a pull into a slow, steady press of fingers into his hair combing through it again just as quickly after. It's probably for the best Bakugou's not in kissing range unless he really tries for it because otherwise Midoriya would be kissing him within an inch of his life. ]
Also we really want to avoid murder, just...as a rule. [ God. God he can't marshall his thoughts into any kind of order but his eyes are burning and it's not because of the sunlight. Midoriya sniffles, flopping back into the hammock and puts his hand over Bakugou's heart, instead, spreading fingers over his chest possessively. ]
There's no one else in the world I'd want to marry, you know. It's always been you.
[This time, for some reason, Bakugou feels bad making Midoriya cry. Heat stretches up into his face, coloring his pale skin; a hot flash to go with the already dry and warm air. Something even the breeze can't cool.
He curls his big, wide hand over Midoriya's own. Squeezes it roughly a second and then just simply holds it like a lifeline.] Shut up with that shit... [It hurts his heart, not in a bad way, and he doesn't want to think about it.
About mistreating the shit out of Midoriya for so long, only for Midoriya to love him almost unconditionally. To never apologize for it. To now have the nerve to ask Midoriya something like this. No, demand it.]
You cryin'? I thought I said to cut that shit out. [His hand comes away, reaches out to brush his fingertips again along Midoriya's jaw.] Hey. Izuku.
You can't say shit like it's always been me. I'm not fucking stupid. There's gotta be... There had to be someone else.
[ They're happy tears, mostly, but more than anything else he's just overwhelmed. Bakugou does that to him, twists him up into a knot that only he can undo. ]
It's your fault.
[ Wet laughter as he chases Bakugou's hand with his lips, tilting his face into the hammock and his hand in equal parts. Between them is the same low buzz of his, their quirk under his skin. When he presses his lips against Bakugou's palm all he can smell is burnt sugar and his mouth waters. ]
When?
[ It's an honest question as he blinks moisture out of his eyes, a little more focused as he realizes that Bakugou's serious, that he's really suggesting someone else. There were other people he'd been interested in, sure, or maybe would consider. There were people he thought were attractive. He had eyes, sure, but... ]
You kissed me in a hallway our last year. [ Midoriya's cheeks might be red but for once he's...steady. This is fact. There's never been any doubt in his mind that as long as Bakugou wanted him, he'd want Bakugou. ] I'd only kissed, dated a few people then. I haven't - [ Here, he stumbles, clearly forcing himself not to stumble any more than he has because Bakugou's always the brave one with this. He has to try his best, too. ] I haven't dated anyone or kissed anyone since the hallway.
[ Since the moment he was sure Bakugou wanted him, liked him, too.
He'd split One for All to save his life without even thinking about it and still didn't regret or doubt that decision. Bakugou's grown into one of the best people he knows and he wants to see just how far he'll go, but also wants to be right there beside him. The hand over his heart flattens palm down a moment and his head falls back against the hammock, Bakugou-themed sunglasses sliding out of his hair with the motion. ]
[His red eyes search Midoriya's closely, back and forth under the blonder lashes. Looking for something that's not there. Some kind of doubt or u-turn he doesn't get. Midoriya is sincere, earnest, and he doesn't know if he loves it or hates it. Both. As always.
Gathering himself up, he turns over onto his stomach and sprawls up over half of Midoriya's torso, letting his feet out of the sand. They sway in the hammock, slow and steady, but his legs are draped over Midoriya's and won't be able to swing them once they finally stop.]
Do you want to?
[This is also sincere, asked low and near the edge of Midoriya's chin as one hand snakes up for the stupid sunglasses. (Don't break his fucking shit, nerd.) Obviously, it won't matter even if Midoriya says yes. Bakugou isn't going to let this catch go. No one else is going to date Midoriya if he has any say so.
But, whatever. He can ask, and that's at least doing what he thinks is a favor. He's!! asking!!]
[ The last thing Midoriya is worried about is whether or not Bakugou can push them in the hammock. Far more important is getting him close enough that Midoriya can hug furiously, and tangle his legs with. As if there's even a question. ]
Yeah. O-of course. [ The hitched breath isn't hesitation, it's giddy, somewhat incredulous laughter. Of course they'd do things in the weirdest possible way. Well, at least he wouldn't ever wonder if that's what Bakugou wanted; now this was just a goal to aim for. Maybe they could say they'll get married when they figure out which of them is the best. That seems like a reasonable incentive. As soon as one of them hits number one, they do it. ] If you hit number one first then I have to marry you, and if I hit it first, then you gotta marry me.
[ It's the stupidest thing he's ever said but he's grinning stupidly up at the sky because they're going to one way or another. ]
You have to help me convince my mom to ask All Might, though. [ HE KNOWS!!! SHE LIKES HIM!!! AND ALL MIGHT LIKES HER TOO!!! Admittedly he only knows because Uraraka had pointed it out, but he knows, and while he's pretty sure he'd explode if All Might was actually his dad he wants his mom happy. Wants All Might happy. ]
...He'd be happy, he's glad we're together. [ His voice goes a little quieter, confessing. ] I told him. What- what I did. I think he knew, even if I didn't say anything... I know users have some sort of link so I think he felt it when it happened. He was waiting for one of us to crack. But he wasn't upset. He said he's happy there's someone I care about that much.
[Gently, Bakugou's brows yank together.] No-- [Wait. Midoriya keeps going, but Bakugou is trying to back up.] Wait-- dammit-- That's not-- [Reaching up, he grabs Midoriya by the wrists of both hands and shoves them down, pinning them into the hammock beside Midoriya's head.]
Fucking listen to me, asshat.
[There. He doesn't release the hands, however. His eyes hold Midoriya fast.] One thing at a fucking time. [He'll get to the whole... Toshinori thing in a moment. Er, both of them.] That's not what I fucking meant.
Do you fucking want to date other damn people, Deku? [His voice keeps the growl, but grows lower.] You said you didn't... after our last year. Do you want to...?
[In a way, he sounds almost reluctant to ask. As if he thinks the answer will be yes. Even if he wouldn't allow it. Even if he's complain.]
[ Oh god. He wasn't asking if Midoriya wanted to. Midoriya squirms, stomach instantly twisting itself up into knots. ]
No, I- Kacchan.
[ His wrists are pinned and Midoriya has a moment where he wants to compliment Bakugou on being balanced here because he once watched Uraraka flip both her and Tsuyu out of one, her floating quirk saving them from landing face-first in the sand. Midoryia's still careful not to fight (yet?) though, not wanting to tempt fate no matter how good Bakugou's balance is.
Still, this seems like an absurd question!!! ]
I'm trying to say I want to marry you! I mean, not... not right this moment either, but later. Why would I want to date other people when I have you?
[Carefully, slowly, Bakugou’s scarlet eyes shift back and forth between Midoriya’s own, over Midoriya’s face like he’s looking for hesitation, doubt. Finally, his hands loosen, and he releases Midoriya’s wrists.] You said you hadn’t fucking dated anyone else. [His voice is surprisingly low but still no less rough.] Like it was shit you regretted.
How you gonna know whether or not to tell me yes and you ain’t ever had anyone else? [It’s such a strange efge to walk. His head dios down and he rests his forehead against Midoriya’s cheek, hiding his eyes and face much like he did after their street fight long ago.] Fucking Uraraka. She had the hots for you. Todoroki. Everybody wanted that playboy bastard.
[On one hand, he knows he’d never allow it. Izuku Midoriya belongs to him. Only yhe strongest deserves the OFA successor, and that’s him. On the other hand... He’s aware of how much of a shithead he is, he has been. If anyone didn’t deserve to have Midoriya, it was definitely him. Having immense arrogance and crippling self-loathing is the wildest, most frustrating thing in the world.]
Midoriya's eyes widen in realization, instantly wanting to negate that because that's not what he meant at all. He stops himself, though, lets Bakugou finish because this is important and he can't keep misunderstanding or making things worse. Bakugou's trying, here, and Midoriya is so full of affection he feels like he's going to burst. ]
I just...do. Why would I want or need anyone else like this?
[ He's kissed other people before. Had fumbling make-out sessions. Everything else, though, was with Bakugou. For years because there's never been anyone else. The mention of Todoroki and Uraraka get a little shrug. He loves them to death and yeah, sure, if things were different maybe? That'd probably only make things worse not assuage his fears, though, so Midoriya uses a newly freed hand to grip the back of Bakugou's neck, tugging him into a kiss. Thinking isn't getting him anywhere; he needs to take a page out of Bakugou's book and just act. Lighting flickers over his fingertips, sparks between their lips and underneath the scent of sunscreen he smells burnt sugar.
When he's done kissing Bakugou within an inch of his life, he leans back against the hammock and presses a lingering kiss to the inside of Bakugou's wrist. ]
[It’s a wonder the two of them don’t honestly flip right over and get dumped into the sand. Bakugou isn’t sitting awkwardly, but regardless of the stability, when Midoriya starts kissing him... Yeah, he isn’t going to not kiss back. Nevermind any kind of depth-reaching kisses like this absolutely get him half hard.
Well. It answers his question in a better way than words.
He has to pause a moment to catch his breath, face flushed and lime-colored lightning popping softly down his neck and over his shoulders. The hand not supporting his weight drops down over Midoriya’s neck and jaw. He brushes his thumb under Midoriya’s bottom lip, brows pulled together.] I just know. [Sure, he’s smooched Kirishima, Urakara just because she was dumb, Kaminari almost for the same reason. None of them had the same spark or drive Midoriya did. Nothing was quite as fulfilling.]
No one else would ever be able to fucking keep up with me.
[ A part of him is honestly bracing for them to go tumbling out at any moment, and maybe he'd welcome that because the distraction would give him some time to think. Bakugou's the worst, best distraction and it's impossible to focus until a challenge is posed. It's like he's hardwired to instantly want to challenge him, to prove that he's worthy of measuring himself up. ]
No one else would be able to beat you.
[ Midoriya tugs Bakugou's head down by his ridiculous hat and can't stop the slow curl of possessiveness that curls through him at the thought of Bakugou in his merch. Another kiss is bitten into his mouth, demanding and then softening into something gentler as his hand curls over the nape of his neck, smooths over his skin.
When it's finished, Midoriya licks the flickers of lighting, the taste of ozone off of his lower lip, pupils dark against the electric green of his eyes. ]
Kissing's never been like that with anyone else, either.
[Kissing really never was like that with anyone else, and he can't even chalk it up to OFA being forced onto him. It had been like that anyway, just unseen. Otherwise, he wouldn't have tackled Midoriya in the dorm hallway trying to shove his tongue down Midoriya's throat.]
Mn.
[He gently pinches his lips between his teeth, like he can feel the last kiss Midoriya gifted him. There's nothing better than seeing the ethereal gleam in Midoriya's eyes; latent energy from the quirk igniting the color of them. If he could eat Midoriya's eyes, he probably would. If he could eat any part of Midoriya, actually, he probably would. But he's an asshole, not a cannibal.
Lazily (and maybe he's hiding a little), he tucks his face into the strong curve of Midoriya's neck, resting his cheek and jaw on Midoriya's shoulder. The beach is warm but not burning here, and he's so relaxed.]
Hey. [He pauses for a moment, but doesn't lift his head.] Anyone fucking else think they got their eye on you? [People he should keep an eye on himself. Sorry, he's kind of garbagely possessive now that Midoriya happens to be willing.]
[ Bakugou relaxes down into him and Midoriya makes a pleased noise in the back of his throat, stretching underneath him. His cock is half-chubbed in his shorts but that's his own fault for kissing Bakugou like that. Gingerly, he adjusts and sinks back down until he can drop a heavy arm around Bakugou's shoulders. ]
I...I don't know?
[ He knows in an abstract way that people want him. He knows that there are people who like him like that, but as to who they are he has no idea. He's too focused on ten thousand other things. ]
No one that I'm aware of. [ No one that matters.
Midoriya's scarred hand slides down the back of Bakguou's tank top, feeling out over the meat of his shoulders, scratching blunt nails lightly up his spine. He doesn't need to ask the question in turn, because he knows. ]
Good. [He’ll peacock enough to bully them out of the picture if so, leaving Midoriya embarrassed and modest, apologizing for his rude behavior.] ‘Cause no one else has got any damn chance.
[He’s aware Midoriya technically belongs to no one, not with this much acquired sass and confidence, not with OFA. Still, it won’t stop him from showing his teeth, barking instead of biting. Try him. Uraraka, Todoroki? Fight him.
He turns his face briefly into Midoriya’s neck again and rumbles. One hand slides under Midoriya’s shirt at the waist, resting wide on the skin between the hip and the bottom of the ribs. Ugh. He’s going to hate getting up and moving.] M’gonna... fall asleep or some shit... probably. [Just as a forewarning to Midoriya when he inevitably passes out on top in the very faintly swaying hammock.]
[ It's too lazy to really be chastising; the sun makes Bakugou warm and sleepy and Bakugou's on top of him. It's doing the same exact thing, the combination of sun and contentment mixing with the faint sounds of water and white noise of people chattering. It's peaceful.
He takes a few photos of them while Bakugou's laid out over him, grinning through the mess of blonde hair. One he sets as his new background. The others are saved, filed away for him to look at later while he lets himself drift. One leg drops down to rock them back and forth, content to lay here until the sun goes down or Bakugou gets bored. Right now, though, the soft pressure of his hand against Midoriya's side combined with the weight of him like some sort of angry anxiety blanket means the most Midoriya does is just touch him, drinking it all in. ]
[The last thing Midoriya gets is a grunted murmur. He says, “Hey,” as if he is going to follow up, but never actually does in the end. His breathing is too steady and deep. Every so often, his body will jump a little. Otherwise, he doesn’t stir, and he dozes for maybe a half and hour. It’s a shame he looks so peaceful and handsome when asleep, face smooth with no scowling wrinkles or twisted lips. The pictures are great even if he’d bitch about them.
Finally, he moves, lazily, scrubbing his face gently into Midoriya’s neck and collar as his body flings him out of light sleep. His head lifts a tad, eyes squinted and blinking, first at Midoriya and then around as if he had forgotten a moment where they were. The best part: his voice is back to crackling with that deep, pleasant drawl.]
How long was I fuckin’ out?
[There’s an angry red imprint of Midoriya’s clothes on the side of his face, and a streaking whelp where he had pressed into Midoriya’s collar bone.]
[ He loves spending time with Bakugou in any capacity but there's a guilty little part of him that enjoys Bakugou asleep because he gets to look at Bakugou as much as he wants. He could spend hours just watching him but Bakugou thinks it's weird and gives him shit for it so he doesn't, usually. Now, he can admire the way his hair frames his face, or trace the lines of pale skin where his tanktop doesn't cover with just his fingertips, committing everything to memory.
This, too: Bakugou's voice when it's the low rumbling growl. Midoriya thunks his head back against the hammock and laughs helplessly rather than answering right away. ]
Mmm, doesn't matter. [ He wasn't paying attention. Midoriya traces the line against Bakugou's cheek, cupping it with his palm a moment later just so his thumb can drag over the swell of Bakugou's bottom lip. For a moment, he does the same thing Bakugou does to him; the staring, the bright-eyed intensity where he's clearly working over something to say and then shaking it off. ] We've still got most of a bottle of rum or water, if you need.
[Luckily, he’s content and drowsy. Midoriya’s affection doesn’t bother him by making him embarrassed, nor does he seems bothered by Midoriya’s staring. Though he does, of course, stare back somewhat curiously.] What...? [The thumb gets his lips to part, but instead of being sexy, he tries to playfully bite what he can.
Then his head butts at Midoriya’s hand before settling in it for a moment. Until he realizes and lifts it back up.] Got an eye problem, nerd? Why the hell you starin’ at me? [He manages to get his eyes open after reaching up to scrub one with his knuckles. This damn beach... and the warm sun, the warmer Midoriya, lying firm beneath him. Dammit.] You been awake this whole time?
[ Midoriya flicks his nose in return and drops his hand at the nape of Bakugou's neck to squeeze. Lying isn't something he's great at but he's decent enough at changing the subject. ]
Mmmhm. Mostly. I was enjoying this, that's all.
[ The moments where they get to relax like this are few and far between and the laziness of this was too much of a draw to resist. The foot planted in the sand braces and pushes, sending them rocking gently back and forth once more. ]
I figure we can stop somewhere and mail everything off on the way back so we don't have to carry it? [ He's absolutely carrying those bags back don't test him. ]
[His nose wrinkles instantly and his eyes squint. He growls, but it’s still thick with sleep and less than half-hearted. The swinging again doesn’t help. He slips down on top of Midoriya like before, jabbing his chin in the other’s chest until he turns his head to the side.] It’s gonna fucking cost an arm and a leg to send that shit back home. [A puff of air blows out of his mouth. It’s fine... His friend better appreciate it.] You ready to go or somethin’?
[Midoriya is not carrying the bags. NOT ALL OF THEM. Bakugou slides his head back and tilts it to peer up at what he can see of Midoriya’s face.]
We can send it all in the same package so it's a little cheaper.
[ Pfft, ready to go? If Bakugou wants to lounge here another four hours he could probably be convinced into it. Sure, he wants to explore the area and see that artist and do a thousand different things but also he wants to enjoy this. He's not making any attempt to rise up. ]
Yeah, yeah. I'm just- I'm thinking?
[ About everything because that's all he knows how to do. They're still young and don't have to get married any time soon; they can wait forever, really, if they wanted to. Realistically, there might be an issue with their perception if they're public about their relationship which may make getting to number one harder; do they want to risk that? It's worth the risk, in Midoriya's mind, and it is in Bakugou's from what he can tell. Their friends would support them, there isn't any doubt about that. Even All Might and their parents would - do, in some cases. ]
Sometimes... it just hits me how lucky I am. That's all. [ Lucky things turned out like this. Lucky Bakugou loves him as much as Midoriya does. Lucky their friends and family are so good. Midoriya tilts his head accommodatingly and lets his eyes close, smiling. ] When you do wanna get up we can get something on the way back. I'll make dinner.
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2019-01-25 10:02 pm (UTC)It's the silence that worries him. Bakugou looks like he's fighting with himself and Midoriya sits up just a little bit, core tensing as he holds himself up and debates if he ought to prod at him or ask him if he's okay. Maybe he's going to say he really wants to get rid of One for All. Maybe he's upset about that? It'd make sense, wouldn't it? Midoriya hadn't really given him a choice and -
And.
And.
Midoriya hears what he says but it's like his brain genuinely can't wrap around the concept of it. This isn't about heroism or being a pro or goals or anything else that he'd considered. This is - was this a proposal? A somewhat impromptu but well-meaning proposal, or was this a hypothetical? Bakugou wouldn't just set all of this up and then bring this up without thinking it over at least a little bit. There might not have been months of planning and forethought but his impulsiveness is usually battle-focused not life-changing declarations of marriage focused. Or maybe it was an impulse. Maybe he'd meant to say something else but didn't or maybe -
He has to say something doesn't he. He's supposed to, even if he doesn't have any idea of what to say but he can't just lay there like an idiot, silent. ]
Oh. You do.
[ Has Bakugou considered this? Midoriya's happy together with him, he loves Bakugou but the Number One hero married to the Number Two? That hasn't ever been done before. Even dating is a little bit of a nightmare in the top ranks because of the competition and everything else, which is why agencies vet people and handle press releases and -
How does it even work? Marriage with being heroes? He's considered it, sure, but it's always been kind of an abstract fantasy. He'd have a ring on Bakugou's finger he could kiss at any point, he and his mom would probably cry a lot and he'd get to say My husband, Katsuki, sure, but the how wasn't ever a point of consideration. It's putting a massive target onto Bakugou's back, too, worse than One for All does because this is public. This is a consistent danger he'd be volunteering himself for. ]
I... when did you...start thinking about this?
no subject
Date: 2019-01-26 12:42 am (UTC)And he thinks weird, they're practically dating for the most part. And he wonders if maybe he was wrong. There's someone else. Todoroki, maybe. Midoriya is playing the field, maybe. Seeing all of the prospects before making a choice.
Ugh. His eyes squeeze shut a second or two, open, seem guarded when they peer at Midoriya this time. He can't think so coldly. He's better than that.] A while, I fuckin' guess... [He didn't exactly propose (or he wasn't trying to, at least), but Midoriya's answer is the typical over-analysis that's expected. He feels like an insect pinned down beneath a microscope. Midoriya is thinking about it in detail, lining everything up, ruining his spontaneity with questions.] Forget it... I didn't fuckin' mean, like... right now or shit.
[His head rolls back over in the opposite direction. He's quick on his feet in battle, but he's not entirely a strategist. He doesn't plan before he goes in. He goes in, hard, relentless, and then he figures out the best moves as he meets challenges. This is... different.
He went in, hard, relentless, with all the passion of his soul, and now he's left floundering, considering all of the pitfalls of it. Secrecy, publicity, infamy, idolatry. He'd have a target on his back, but like hell he wouldn't stomp down the street, wearing it proudly. Daring anyone to mess with him. Daring anyone to mess with Midoriya.]
no subject
Date: 2019-01-26 01:30 am (UTC)[ He's just repeating what Bakugou's saying which isn't helping anything but his mind can't stop working over all of the options and possibilities and the shock that this is what Bakugou would want. Midoriya had kind of assumed it was a given on his own part; he wanted to spend as much time with Bakugou as humanly possible because he loved him. A life with him however he could have it was what Midoriya wanted but he'd...just sort of assumed Bakugou might not want the same.
In retrospect it feels stupid. He needs to say something sooner rather than later, though, or Bakugou's going to get the wrong idea and that's the last thing he wants. Bakugou's brave and Midoriya has always admired it but this is a different kind of bravery he can't minimize.
Slowly, the hand in his hair curls, urges him to tip his head back. It feels weird to have this conversation like this, but it's also...good. Right, in a way, that it's private and a little unexpectedly romantic. ]
I want... [ He stops, tongue running over his teeth as he pauses again, trying to work his train of thought into something useful. ] I want you. I keep thinking about how to say it, but that's really...what it boils down to, I guess. You've always been here with me in one way or another and I want that as long as I can have it, in whatever way I can have it. It was just - just surprising, I think.
[ His laugh doesn't have any humor to it, just a little shakiness. ]
You're amazing. I know I say that but sometimes I don't think even you believe just how much- how I- you're amazing, Kacchan. I want everything. It feels selfish, but that's what I want. Everything you wanna give me.
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Date: 2019-01-26 02:09 am (UTC)Well, he thinks as hard as he can he's amazing. What he really thinks is he's still the cause for a lot of misfortune to one of the greatest heroes to ever live.
Reaching up, he brushes his fingers over Midoriya's freckled face, up into Midoriya's hair where he curls his fingers and tugs. Firmly, but not painfully. His hand drops away, and he grunts in the back of his throat.] Quit lookin' at me with that stupid fucking face, nerd. [His eyes lower. He wants to turn away again, but knows Midoriya will just turn him back.]
I'm not gonna fucking be some two-digit hero married to the Number One. And you're not gonna fucking be some damn two-digit hero married to Number One either, not with your quirk. I'm fucking first, and you're second. Got it, dumbass?
If it comes down to it, you're first, and I'm second. So if you think I'm not going to claim you because of it, you're fucking stupid. I don't care who I have to kill. The only way you're standing at the fucking top is if you manage to get me out of the way. And the only damn one worthy of marrying you is whoever is second.
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Date: 2019-01-26 02:16 am (UTC)S'just my face, jerk.
[ Midoriya tugs at Bakugou's hair in turn though the motion turns from a pull into a slow, steady press of fingers into his hair combing through it again just as quickly after. It's probably for the best Bakugou's not in kissing range unless he really tries for it because otherwise Midoriya would be kissing him within an inch of his life. ]
Also we really want to avoid murder, just...as a rule. [ God. God he can't marshall his thoughts into any kind of order but his eyes are burning and it's not because of the sunlight. Midoriya sniffles, flopping back into the hammock and puts his hand over Bakugou's heart, instead, spreading fingers over his chest possessively. ]
There's no one else in the world I'd want to marry, you know. It's always been you.
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Date: 2019-01-26 03:53 am (UTC)He curls his big, wide hand over Midoriya's own. Squeezes it roughly a second and then just simply holds it like a lifeline.] Shut up with that shit... [It hurts his heart, not in a bad way, and he doesn't want to think about it.
About mistreating the shit out of Midoriya for so long, only for Midoriya to love him almost unconditionally. To never apologize for it. To now have the nerve to ask Midoriya something like this. No, demand it.]
You cryin'? I thought I said to cut that shit out. [His hand comes away, reaches out to brush his fingertips again along Midoriya's jaw.] Hey. Izuku.
You can't say shit like it's always been me. I'm not fucking stupid. There's gotta be... There had to be someone else.
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Date: 2019-01-26 04:08 am (UTC)It's your fault.
[ Wet laughter as he chases Bakugou's hand with his lips, tilting his face into the hammock and his hand in equal parts. Between them is the same low buzz of his, their quirk under his skin. When he presses his lips against Bakugou's palm all he can smell is burnt sugar and his mouth waters. ]
When?
[ It's an honest question as he blinks moisture out of his eyes, a little more focused as he realizes that Bakugou's serious, that he's really suggesting someone else. There were other people he'd been interested in, sure, or maybe would consider. There were people he thought were attractive. He had eyes, sure, but... ]
You kissed me in a hallway our last year. [ Midoriya's cheeks might be red but for once he's...steady. This is fact. There's never been any doubt in his mind that as long as Bakugou wanted him, he'd want Bakugou. ] I'd only kissed, dated a few people then. I haven't - [ Here, he stumbles, clearly forcing himself not to stumble any more than he has because Bakugou's always the brave one with this. He has to try his best, too. ] I haven't dated anyone or kissed anyone since the hallway.
[ Since the moment he was sure Bakugou wanted him, liked him, too.
He'd split One for All to save his life without even thinking about it and still didn't regret or doubt that decision. Bakugou's grown into one of the best people he knows and he wants to see just how far he'll go, but also wants to be right there beside him. The hand over his heart flattens palm down a moment and his head falls back against the hammock, Bakugou-themed sunglasses sliding out of his hair with the motion. ]
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Date: 2019-01-26 04:31 am (UTC)Gathering himself up, he turns over onto his stomach and sprawls up over half of Midoriya's torso, letting his feet out of the sand. They sway in the hammock, slow and steady, but his legs are draped over Midoriya's and won't be able to swing them once they finally stop.]
Do you want to?
[This is also sincere, asked low and near the edge of Midoriya's chin as one hand snakes up for the stupid sunglasses. (Don't break his fucking shit, nerd.) Obviously, it won't matter even if Midoriya says yes. Bakugou isn't going to let this catch go. No one else is going to date Midoriya if he has any say so.
But, whatever. He can ask, and that's at least doing what he thinks is a favor. He's!! asking!!]
midoriya's dad doesn't exist
Date: 2019-01-26 04:57 am (UTC)Yeah. O-of course. [ The hitched breath isn't hesitation, it's giddy, somewhat incredulous laughter. Of course they'd do things in the weirdest possible way. Well, at least he wouldn't ever wonder if that's what Bakugou wanted; now this was just a goal to aim for. Maybe they could say they'll get married when they figure out which of them is the best. That seems like a reasonable incentive. As soon as one of them hits number one, they do it. ] If you hit number one first then I have to marry you, and if I hit it first, then you gotta marry me.
[ It's the stupidest thing he's ever said but he's grinning stupidly up at the sky because they're going to one way or another. ]
You have to help me convince my mom to ask All Might, though. [ HE KNOWS!!! SHE LIKES HIM!!! AND ALL MIGHT LIKES HER TOO!!! Admittedly he only knows because Uraraka had pointed it out, but he knows, and while he's pretty sure he'd explode if All Might was actually his dad he wants his mom happy. Wants All Might happy. ]
...He'd be happy, he's glad we're together. [ His voice goes a little quieter, confessing. ] I told him. What- what I did. I think he knew, even if I didn't say anything... I know users have some sort of link so I think he felt it when it happened. He was waiting for one of us to crack. But he wasn't upset. He said he's happy there's someone I care about that much.
how dare you say all might doesn't exist
Date: 2019-01-26 05:06 am (UTC)Fucking listen to me, asshat.
[There. He doesn't release the hands, however. His eyes hold Midoriya fast.] One thing at a fucking time. [He'll get to the whole... Toshinori thing in a moment. Er, both of them.] That's not what I fucking meant.
Do you fucking want to date other damn people, Deku? [His voice keeps the growl, but grows lower.] You said you didn't... after our last year. Do you want to...?
[In a way, he sounds almost reluctant to ask. As if he thinks the answer will be yes. Even if he wouldn't allow it. Even if he's complain.]
hori pls. tho i'm sure it's going to be some villain or sth
Date: 2019-01-26 05:13 am (UTC)No, I- Kacchan.
[ His wrists are pinned and Midoriya has a moment where he wants to compliment Bakugou on being balanced here because he once watched Uraraka flip both her and Tsuyu out of one, her floating quirk saving them from landing face-first in the sand. Midoryia's still careful not to fight (yet?) though, not wanting to tempt fate no matter how good Bakugou's balance is.
Still, this seems like an absurd question!!! ]
I'm trying to say I want to marry you! I mean, not... not right this moment either, but later. Why would I want to date other people when I have you?
hori out here testing me like i wont be mad
Date: 2019-01-27 02:50 am (UTC)How you gonna know whether or not to tell me yes and you ain’t ever had anyone else? [It’s such a strange efge to walk. His head dios down and he rests his forehead against Midoriya’s cheek, hiding his eyes and face much like he did after their street fight long ago.] Fucking Uraraka. She had the hots for you. Todoroki. Everybody wanted that playboy bastard.
[On one hand, he knows he’d never allow it. Izuku Midoriya belongs to him. Only yhe strongest deserves the OFA successor, and that’s him. On the other hand... He’s aware of how much of a shithead he is, he has been. If anyone didn’t deserve to have Midoriya, it was definitely him. Having immense arrogance and crippling self-loathing is the wildest, most frustrating thing in the world.]
How do you fucking know for certain?
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Date: 2019-01-27 03:00 am (UTC)Midoriya's eyes widen in realization, instantly wanting to negate that because that's not what he meant at all. He stops himself, though, lets Bakugou finish because this is important and he can't keep misunderstanding or making things worse. Bakugou's trying, here, and Midoriya is so full of affection he feels like he's going to burst. ]
I just...do. Why would I want or need anyone else like this?
[ He's kissed other people before. Had fumbling make-out sessions. Everything else, though, was with Bakugou. For years because there's never been anyone else. The mention of Todoroki and Uraraka get a little shrug. He loves them to death and yeah, sure, if things were different maybe? That'd probably only make things worse not assuage his fears, though, so Midoriya uses a newly freed hand to grip the back of Bakugou's neck, tugging him into a kiss. Thinking isn't getting him anywhere; he needs to take a page out of Bakugou's book and just act. Lighting flickers over his fingertips, sparks between their lips and underneath the scent of sunscreen he smells burnt sugar.
When he's done kissing Bakugou within an inch of his life, he leans back against the hammock and presses a lingering kiss to the inside of Bakugou's wrist. ]
How do you know for certain?
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Date: 2019-01-27 03:50 am (UTC)Well. It answers his question in a better way than words.
He has to pause a moment to catch his breath, face flushed and lime-colored lightning popping softly down his neck and over his shoulders. The hand not supporting his weight drops down over Midoriya’s neck and jaw. He brushes his thumb under Midoriya’s bottom lip, brows pulled together.] I just know. [Sure, he’s smooched Kirishima, Urakara just because she was dumb, Kaminari almost for the same reason. None of them had the same spark or drive Midoriya did. Nothing was quite as fulfilling.]
No one else would ever be able to fucking keep up with me.
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Date: 2019-01-27 05:08 pm (UTC)No one else would be able to beat you.
[ Midoriya tugs Bakugou's head down by his ridiculous hat and can't stop the slow curl of possessiveness that curls through him at the thought of Bakugou in his merch. Another kiss is bitten into his mouth, demanding and then softening into something gentler as his hand curls over the nape of his neck, smooths over his skin.
When it's finished, Midoriya licks the flickers of lighting, the taste of ozone off of his lower lip, pupils dark against the electric green of his eyes. ]
Kissing's never been like that with anyone else, either.
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Date: 2019-01-28 03:10 pm (UTC)Mn.
[He gently pinches his lips between his teeth, like he can feel the last kiss Midoriya gifted him. There's nothing better than seeing the ethereal gleam in Midoriya's eyes; latent energy from the quirk igniting the color of them. If he could eat Midoriya's eyes, he probably would. If he could eat any part of Midoriya, actually, he probably would. But he's an asshole, not a cannibal.
Lazily (and maybe he's hiding a little), he tucks his face into the strong curve of Midoriya's neck, resting his cheek and jaw on Midoriya's shoulder. The beach is warm but not burning here, and he's so relaxed.]
Hey. [He pauses for a moment, but doesn't lift his head.] Anyone fucking else think they got their eye on you? [People he should keep an eye on himself. Sorry, he's kind of garbagely possessive now that Midoriya happens to be willing.]
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Date: 2019-01-28 05:24 pm (UTC)I...I don't know?
[ He knows in an abstract way that people want him. He knows that there are people who like him like that, but as to who they are he has no idea. He's too focused on ten thousand other things. ]
No one that I'm aware of. [ No one that matters.
Midoriya's scarred hand slides down the back of Bakguou's tank top, feeling out over the meat of his shoulders, scratching blunt nails lightly up his spine. He doesn't need to ask the question in turn, because he knows. ]
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Date: 2019-01-29 09:07 pm (UTC)[He’s aware Midoriya technically belongs to no one, not with this much acquired sass and confidence, not with OFA. Still, it won’t stop him from showing his teeth, barking instead of biting. Try him. Uraraka, Todoroki? Fight him.
He turns his face briefly into Midoriya’s neck again and rumbles. One hand slides under Midoriya’s shirt at the waist, resting wide on the skin between the hip and the bottom of the ribs. Ugh. He’s going to hate getting up and moving.] M’gonna... fall asleep or some shit... probably. [Just as a forewarning to Midoriya when he inevitably passes out on top in the very faintly swaying hammock.]
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Date: 2019-01-29 09:23 pm (UTC)[ It's too lazy to really be chastising; the sun makes Bakugou warm and sleepy and Bakugou's on top of him. It's doing the same exact thing, the combination of sun and contentment mixing with the faint sounds of water and white noise of people chattering. It's peaceful.
He takes a few photos of them while Bakugou's laid out over him, grinning through the mess of blonde hair. One he sets as his new background. The others are saved, filed away for him to look at later while he lets himself drift. One leg drops down to rock them back and forth, content to lay here until the sun goes down or Bakugou gets bored. Right now, though, the soft pressure of his hand against Midoriya's side combined with the weight of him like some sort of angry anxiety blanket means the most Midoriya does is just touch him, drinking it all in. ]
I'll wake you up if anything interesting happens.
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Date: 2019-01-29 09:50 pm (UTC)Finally, he moves, lazily, scrubbing his face gently into Midoriya’s neck and collar as his body flings him out of light sleep. His head lifts a tad, eyes squinted and blinking, first at Midoriya and then around as if he had forgotten a moment where they were. The best part: his voice is back to crackling with that deep, pleasant drawl.]
How long was I fuckin’ out?
[There’s an angry red imprint of Midoriya’s clothes on the side of his face, and a streaking whelp where he had pressed into Midoriya’s collar bone.]
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Date: 2019-01-29 10:15 pm (UTC)This, too: Bakugou's voice when it's the low rumbling growl. Midoriya thunks his head back against the hammock and laughs helplessly rather than answering right away. ]
Mmm, doesn't matter. [ He wasn't paying attention. Midoriya traces the line against Bakugou's cheek, cupping it with his palm a moment later just so his thumb can drag over the swell of Bakugou's bottom lip. For a moment, he does the same thing Bakugou does to him; the staring, the bright-eyed intensity where he's clearly working over something to say and then shaking it off. ] We've still got most of a bottle of rum or water, if you need.
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Date: 2019-01-29 11:42 pm (UTC)[Luckily, he’s content and drowsy. Midoriya’s affection doesn’t bother him by making him embarrassed, nor does he seems bothered by Midoriya’s staring. Though he does, of course, stare back somewhat curiously.] What...? [The thumb gets his lips to part, but instead of being sexy, he tries to playfully bite what he can.
Then his head butts at Midoriya’s hand before settling in it for a moment. Until he realizes and lifts it back up.] Got an eye problem, nerd? Why the hell you starin’ at me? [He manages to get his eyes open after reaching up to scrub one with his knuckles. This damn beach... and the warm sun, the warmer Midoriya, lying firm beneath him. Dammit.] You been awake this whole time?
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Date: 2019-01-29 11:51 pm (UTC)[ Midoriya flicks his nose in return and drops his hand at the nape of Bakugou's neck to squeeze. Lying isn't something he's great at but he's decent enough at changing the subject. ]
Mmmhm. Mostly. I was enjoying this, that's all.
[ The moments where they get to relax like this are few and far between and the laziness of this was too much of a draw to resist. The foot planted in the sand braces and pushes, sending them rocking gently back and forth once more. ]
I figure we can stop somewhere and mail everything off on the way back so we don't have to carry it? [ He's absolutely carrying those bags back don't test him. ]
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Date: 2019-01-30 12:06 am (UTC)[His nose wrinkles instantly and his eyes squint. He growls, but it’s still thick with sleep and less than half-hearted. The swinging again doesn’t help. He slips down on top of Midoriya like before, jabbing his chin in the other’s chest until he turns his head to the side.] It’s gonna fucking cost an arm and a leg to send that shit back home. [A puff of air blows out of his mouth. It’s fine... His friend better appreciate it.] You ready to go or somethin’?
[Midoriya is not carrying the bags. NOT ALL OF THEM. Bakugou slides his head back and tilts it to peer up at what he can see of Midoriya’s face.]
Hey. You... alright, you shithead?
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Date: 2019-01-30 12:27 am (UTC)[ Pfft, ready to go? If Bakugou wants to lounge here another four hours he could probably be convinced into it. Sure, he wants to explore the area and see that artist and do a thousand different things but also he wants to enjoy this. He's not making any attempt to rise up. ]
Yeah, yeah. I'm just- I'm thinking?
[ About everything because that's all he knows how to do. They're still young and don't have to get married any time soon; they can wait forever, really, if they wanted to. Realistically, there might be an issue with their perception if they're public about their relationship which may make getting to number one harder; do they want to risk that? It's worth the risk, in Midoriya's mind, and it is in Bakugou's from what he can tell. Their friends would support them, there isn't any doubt about that. Even All Might and their parents would - do, in some cases. ]
Sometimes... it just hits me how lucky I am. That's all. [ Lucky things turned out like this. Lucky Bakugou loves him as much as Midoriya does. Lucky their friends and family are so good. Midoriya tilts his head accommodatingly and lets his eyes close, smiling. ] When you do wanna get up we can get something on the way back. I'll make dinner.
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